"I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book. The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right." - Groucho Marx

Snow falling...the night (alright, day) before Christmas...the bare minimum of food rattling around the fridge...and very little thought given to the question of what to eat over the Christmas/Boxing day festivities. Or does the idea of vacuously staring at the aisles in the supermarket, waiting for inspiration to hit, count as "preparation"?

Just about the time I should be hunkering down by the Christmas tree with a copy of The I Hate to Cook Book (50th Anniversary Edition) and a selection of take-out menus...