When life hands you lemons (according to those pesky do-gooders), you make lemonade. When life hands you temperatures over 100 degrees...and a fridge full of fruit...you spend some time curled up in a ball under a cold shower, rocking back-and-forth. Once you're done with that...you make cherry granita.
2 pounds sweet cherries (I used Rainier because that's what was in my fridge)
1/4 cup sugar
grated zest and juice of 1/2 large orange
1/2 teaspoon almond extract (actual almond extract if possible, not the fake stuff)
1 cup water
Pit the cherries; if you have a cherry pitter, you're luckier than I am. If you don’t have a pitter, use a paring knife to cut the cherries in half, pull out the pits, and put the cherries in a bowl (all steps to be done while loudly cursing your lack of pitter). Combine the cherries with the sugar, orange zest, orange juice, almond extract, and salt in the large bowl. Stir well, then set aside for 1 hour to macerate (e.g., "stew in their own juices"...that'll teach the pit wielding swine!)
While the cherries stand, clear a place in your freezer to fit the dish you are going to freeze this in, such as a 9x13-inch baking dish.
Put the macerated cherry mixture and water in a blender and puree. Pour into a flat, shallow, freezer-safe container (such as a glass 9x13-inch baking or storage dish) that is large enough so the mixture is not more than one inch deep. Cover with plastic wrap or a lid and place in the freezer. When the mixture begins to get icy (about 1 hour), stir, breaking up the ice crystals with a fork. Return to the freezer. Repeat this step two more times, then let mixture freeze solid for at least 3 hours or up to a day.
Sit in front of air-conditioning and apply spoon to granita. Insert into mouth. Repeat.